When a crisis such as job loss happens in your life you will go through a series of emotions.
THIS IS NORMAL!
Most people have been in your position, whether they have lost your job on their own terms or on someone else's. Even though this is the case, it feels like you are the only one who knows how this feels and that no matter what people say, they cannot imagine what is going on in your head. Know that this is a transition period in your life and that you have options.
Below are some ways to cope with your transition and how to better understand the stages you will most likely go through.
What to Know
Recognize that the emotions you are feeling are completely normal. Yes, it takes time, but you are in the thick of it right now and it is different for everyone. Also, be aware of the change curve (below), and that you will go through a series of emotions good, bad and indifferent.
How to Deal with Each Stage of Emotions
The first stage is shock and potentially denial.
In Stage 1 or 2 you may have a tendency to blame yourself or others. This is normal, however, find a way to try and move past it. Blame is a negative energy that will only lead to a negative mindset.
In Stage 3 you will experience frustration or anger. When your experiencing these emotions, DO NOT BURN BRIDGES.
You may need those people as references in the future. Be mindful of who you speak to and what you say to ensure you keep as much leverage as possible.
In Stage 4 you may be going through uncertainty and self-doubt. This stage may progress for a while. My best advice is to understand your resources and who you can talk to about your situation. Keeping it all inside does you no good. If you do not have resources to talk to such as family or friends, try reaching out to a former co-worker or a recommended therapist.
Try to think positive, they say you cannot be thinking two things at once, so manifest your next steps and be positive.
WHAT THERAPY? I DON'T NEED THERAPY!
That is a normal response, but know that your mind is a part of your body. Just as your body needs exercise to stay healthy, so does your brain. Having an objective opinion can help you to be more self-aware and provide you the direction you may need.
What if an Emotional Stage is taking longer than expected?
If you are feeling that the uncertainty anger or self-doubt stage is taking longer than normal, I would recommend talking to a professional. We all hit low points in our life and the emotions after job loss can be intense with impacts sometimes occurring when we last expect it. Having an outlet to speak with is an important step in getting back to the normal you.
Don't Skip the Experimentation Stage
- Sometimes we want to jump right into the Problem-solving / Decision stage, however, challenge yourself to take a closer look at the experimentation stage, Stage 5. This is the perfect time in your life to reevaluate your goals and ensure that you are on the right path. Look at this time as an opportunity.
- Stage 6, the decision stage is very important as you are accepting the past and moving on! Kudos...its about time! However, when in this stage, be sure that you are all in. We can sometimes come out of the exploration stage with doubts, whatever your next move is in your career, commit full on.
- Stage 7 is integration. At this point you should be in your new role, whatever that is and have made progress in your next steps. Best of luck to you.
What if I Skipped a Step
It is okay if you do not experience or recognize all of these emotions after job loss. There is no wrong way to process, as long as you have accepted the past and have moved forward. We all deal with things in our own way and in our own time.
I found that speaking with friends was especially helpful, especially those that understood my work ethic and expertise. I surrounded myself with people that inspired me to further myself as well as those that were good listeners.
From personal experience, keeping a positive mindset and framing the situation as an opportunity rather than a negative, helped drive me forward.
Positioning this transition as a new beginning rather than just a close of a chapter helped to propel me to succeed. Keeping this type of mentality helped me through each stage and gave me more momentum to reach the next. Think about, "your next chapter" and how you can move forward. You got this, keep your head up, and think positive.
For more on job loss and a FREE guide on how to get your swagger back, click here! The guide contains actionable steps that you can start doing today! Download the glorified to do list so that you don't need to walk through this process alone. After completing this list you should feel confident to take your life and career to the next level.